I like this picture, it's my favourite! because everyone looks so candid and happy
2SC3 <3 <3 <3
People I go to school every morning with! (minus Tim hoho)
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We all looked like goddesses and gods, glowing and smooth, sheathed from head to foot by a golden essence that glistens and refracted its aura of power - the wonder ichor called youth.
We moved as easily as dolphins surging out of the ocean, cleaving massed tons of transparent water streaming away in swathes of bubbling Silver like the plasm of life.
Still potent from those black and white photos, the palpable electric charge between us, like the negative and positive poles of a battery, or the fingers of Adam and God.
We were beautiful, without exception. I could hardly bear to look at those old albums, to see the lost glamour we never noticed when we were first together - when we were young.
- Friends' Photos, Ruth Fainlight
Two years really flew by and I'm not sure if I'm ready to leave this my 12 years of...whatever you call this stage before university. I'm really scared and sad, and I want nothing more to remain in this moment forever, but I guess, life has to go on.
The girls! Sweetest friendliest most amazing people ever.
The boy boys. Yeah the picture pretty much sums up what they're really like
I'm really blessed to have such a lovely class and I think Sabel was really apt when she said that even though our class seems pretty separated, with all the different subject combinations and all, we're always around for each other when we really need it. I think that's really amazing Plus we have an awesome sense of humour
And AC Dance - it's more than a CCA to me (and to everyone else, I'm sure!) It's been like a haven and refuge; somewhere I can go to and leave all my worries and troubles behind, and just be with this lovely beautiful group of people, connected by a common passion
Of the future: More than anything, I want Dance to be in some part of my life. More than anything. (because to dance is to live, and to live is to dance!)
And I may not be aiming to be a doctor, or engineer or some high-paying job that requires years of dedication and effort at a prestigious university. But all I want to do and all that will make me satisfied, is just doing something that will help even just a small group of people and/or animals, and to give them peace. And I think I can get that through FASS' Social Work or Sociology (I hope I'm right)
I also want to go backpacking around the world, South America, Southeast Asia, Europe. I want to go on mission trips, I want to volunteer at SPCA, I want to go around capturing people's joy at small things on photographs, I want to discover new bands........
But most of all most of all, I want to fulfill God's plans for me.
PS Baccalaureate service was really inspiring (But we had to lug the ACS Story around the whole day!!!!!!)
It's been an incredibly tumultuous week this past week. With incredible ups in the simplest and most beautiful ways, to the lowest of the lows, to places I've never gone for a long time:
Of Leaving JC, and The Future. But more about that when Baccalaureate comes
Of Death. I've seen just how strong one can become, in the face of death. And that really touched me, and open my eyes.
I guess I've experienced my fair share of going to wakes and experiencing my loved ones/people close to me dying recently, both my granddads, both my uncles, and my grandaunt was just diagnosed with cancer. And it's really not easy, to see the one you look up to, whom you thought of as strong and indestructible (like my granddads), becoming helpless against cancer. It's hard to see someone who was strong and capable, losing the fight despite fighting so hard, to wither into almost nothing. It's hard to wake up everyday, hoping for a miracle that never happened. It's hard to experience four deaths in a span of 2 years, going through the same cycle over and over.
So yeah, what happened on friday sort of brought me back to these memories (that I try really hard not to remember)
My priest told me once, in a homily, that people die, not because God "needs" them in Heaven. He doesn't need to do that, because He has angels with Him. Death is evil, and people die because of satan, because of the sins we commit. That made me realise that the only way to win this fight against evil and sin, we should make peace and live everyday with love. And to go on living everyday to the fullest, with no regrets, finding happiness in even the smallest of places, and helping whoever in need in whatever ways we can.
I remember worrying constantly about my parents, because I know that it's inevitable that I'll lose them someday (given the family history... -.-) But I can see now that all I can do is to treasure every moment with them, and make the most of everyday.
Of the A Levels. I'm scared, because I'm not as focused as when I was preparing for the Prelims. And I'm scared because I can't seem to get back that drive and motivation. I'm scared of leaving the exam hall filled with regret. I'm scared of not doing well enough to get to NUS FASS I don't want to settle for second best, it's not an option.
Fighting all the demons will take time?
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But of the ups!
I was praying in church before mass on sunday, and when mass started, all the hymns sung were answers to my prayer
(500) DAYS OF SUMMER WAS SO LOVELY AND AWESOME. Joseph Gordon-Levitt is really quirky and cute and Zooey Deschanel is really pretty! Incredible soundtrack + awesome actors + not too cliche plot =
Lyrical Jazz on friday was so good. I look forward to it so much, because Dance is my only outlet to fully express myself, and I can feel all my troubles dissolving the more I dance
My friends helped me a lot. And I can only thank God for them
LIFE IS BEAUTIFUL, BUT IT'S COMPLICATED WE BARELY MAKE IT WE DON'T NEED TO UNDERSTAND THERE ARE MIRACLES, MIRACLES
STAND WHERE YOU ARE WE LET ALL THESE MOMENTS, PASS US BY
(LET THE MONSTERS SEE YOU SMILE)
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I am grateful
1. because I've been going about my day not finding a purpose in what I'm doing, but now I have a clear goal in mind, and I feel more settled I really thank God.
Well It may not seem like much (esp since most of my classmates are all aiming to be doctors, researchers etc etc) but I just want to get good grades, and get into NUS FASS Sociology or Social Work I just went to the websites, and I got so excited reading about what the department has to offer!!!
It may not be the case for the would-be doctors and whatnot, but this means a lot to me. Helping people as your job - what greater joy can there be? I want to be a peace maker, not just a peace keeper. I like the fact that there's no big salary that comes with this. Why earn so much when the money can be channeled to others who need it more? And besides.....I'm so not a science person (look at the state of my math.... -.-)
If I were really daring, I honestly would want to go for Literature or Philosophy. But...my lit is terrible at the current moment and I don't know where I'll go after if I take Philosophy. If I were even more daring, I would want to go La Salle. Yeah and that will only happen in my dreams
2. (Oh I'd give anything to go back to the SYF days!!!)
I had a really nice time catching up with Samdish the magic unicorn on his birthday!!!! It's been too long and it was a really nice break from govab (the worst chapter ever)
3. Tomorrow's friday, I SURVIVED ANOTHER WEEK. And I don't regret a single day
The feeling of being "okay" does not imply that the person has risen above all his faults and emotional problems. It merely implies that he refuses to be paralyzed by them.
Tomorrow's monday, it's a brand new week! This week was really hard to get through. It just really sucks when you get more than one person asking you, oh why is XX spending more time alone with her than with you? and shit like that.
I guess I wasn't bothered by it at all in the past but it really irks me and frustrates me when she doesn't even have the teeniest bit of respect or decency to tell me or even acknowledge that it happened. When she just acts as if nothing has happened.
I hate that I let this get to me but I know that it will get better, because I've got my friends, and my Daddy God! I won't let this hold me down! And I'm still grateful for everything that happened this week because
I now know who I can really trust, and I know who really cares about me, and I know who my true friends are. And because of this, I've gotten a lot closer to some friends
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Anyway! What happened this week (minus the down parts) 1. Lyrical Jazz! I love fridays, it's something to look forward to
2. I am hooked on INGLOURIOUS BASTERDS' OST It's so lovely and I am so going to get my hands on the dvd when it comes out, I can't stop thinking about the movie!!!!
3. Tuition on thursday with chan's min! Had a really really nice talk with her, I got to get things off my chest and it's nice to know she understands
4. FAME the movie. It was nothing compared to the original but wow THE DANCES WERE SO LOVELY!!!!!!! I could feel the passion of the dancers, esp in the last dance! Also, I may be biased towards movies about dance
It's raw and delightfully quirky and unpredictable and funny and brutal and in-your-face, I love every scene every second of it!!!!! I love the plot and the twists, and the structure of the movie and the soundtrack, oh the soundtrack is heavenly!!!
Plus, there's Eli Roth:
Yummy
Oh wow I don't even know how to put the extent of its wonderfulness and magnificence into words; this is as good as Pulp Fiction, maybe more I'm going to watch this over and over again, I love spaghetti western type movies
